Graduation

The past few days have been busy. Work as usual, Friday night I went to Bradley & Shane's graduation. The good news is, when you have 50 students graduating things tend to be short and sweet. Just the way I like it. Afterwards, me & Bradley's family went out for dinner at Red Lobster. I had a really good time. A few glasses of wine and an awesome waiter really made the night. I'm glad Bradley has finally left high school, now maybe reality will settle in for him. Saturday after work, I went to a graduation gathering for Shane (and his cousin Cody) which was a lot of fun. A few more glasses of wine and now this weekend has a five star rating from me :) Reporting back to work at 7 A.M. sharp tomorrow (yes Mary hates me).

Red means stop

Great work day today, we weren't too busy, but very steady. Just the way I like it. I think the only thing I could think of was switching to AT&T so I can get my iPhone. I went to purchase the phone yesterday, but realized I lost my i.d. as I was being checked out. Just my luck, of course. The good news is I have a couple days to allow the situation to marinate before I make my final decision. My license has to be around here somewhere??? Saw a homeless guy yesterday after leaving the AT&T store, I was blessed to have the opportunity to meet him and bless him with what spare money I had. You never really know where people have been or what they've seen that leads to their current situation. I have reservations about judging homeless people. I trust that if I give them money from my heart for the right reasons what they do with it will be judged by God. Of course I wanted this man to buy himself some food. I can't stand the thought of people being hungry.

Today as I was leaving work, I ran a red light. And of all days, I got stopped by the cops for this traffic violation. It wasn't even worth my breath to try an talk my way out of this. I was guilty --caught red handed. Yep, I got a ticket. What a way to end my Saturday :) Life could be worse huh? I could be homeless. So thank God for an expensive lesson learned.

Unconditional love is unparalleled

I LOVE MY DOGS! They're my best friends, they really are. They love me unconditionally no matter if I deserve it or not. Their love reminds me of the love the Lord has for all of us. No matter what we've done, the love is still there. It feels great to have a love like that. I have four awesome friends, Madison, Gibby, Jack & Prissy. Thank God for mans best friend!

Serenity

The last few days I've had to stop. Literally stop and think about what I want. Nothing in this world compares to serenity. That place is so incredible --when you're happy with your life, no matter how intense some of your personal circumstances/problems may be. You still have the feeling of knowing, no matter what you'll be alright. How great it is to not care what people say and think about you. In all the thinking I've done, I saw that somewhere along the way I got away from living that way. I want to be free of all the nothingness that won't matter in the end anyway. I've made up in my mind that I'm done with certain people and situations. If a person is going to continually make you unhappy, why waste time trying to fix something that can't be fixed. Relationships always involve more than one person, so one person can't fix everything, it takes team work. I'm burnt out with fighting an uphill battle with pointless individuals who thrive off of drama and confusion. I'm going back to that place of serenity that I know I should live in. Peace, peace, & more peace...until I can't take it anymore.

The confrontation

Yeah it was bound to happen. I can only deal with so much, before a situation must be addressed. Today the receptionist at my job pushed my last button. I initially intended on having a "civil" discussion, like adults are expected to have. Silly me, did I really forget who I was dealing with??? Seriously this person handles most things at the same level of your average 8th grader. Perhaps it was my fault for even attempting to confront such a difficult person, but I'm happy I was able to let her know where she stands. She's even more of a coward than I originally anticipated, she (for the most part) ran away and denied everything and pinned it on the Doctor I work with. Some people are just destined to be pathetic and there's nothing that can really be done. Oh well, life goes on, tomorrow is going to be great.

Unhappy people

Have you ever met someone that you feel sorry for, because they seem like they aren't happy and don't want to be happy? One of my co-workers, the receptionist in particular has got to be one of the most unhappy, discontented people I know of. I no longer feel sorry for her, my sorrow has turned into rage (honestly). I found out today that she's been giving her personal opinion of my friendship with another co-worker. Basically she knows nothing about nothing, but insists of expressing her thoughts. This vexes me, because I am a direct person. I'd love to confront the situation, but for the fact that I don't want any drama at work or for her (the receptionist) to be angry with anyone else at work. At this point I've given up on her ever being a decent human being, I've come to the conclusion that she's a sad and pathetic case. And the sad apart about it all is that she's content and "happy" being in the position she's in --she's at peace with having no dignity or true friends. I guess I have to just suck it up and let it fly. Back to work tomorrow. All smiles.

Grey's Anatomy

Today was much better. Time to report back to work:) As soon as I walked in the hospital I saw two of my favorite clients, the Detienne's. I thank God for clients like them, it seems like a lot of people are just very unhappy, and they come in just to say and do things to ruin the day. So it means a lot to have good hearted, kind, & patient clients who make your day much better, no matter how crazy things get. Sadly not long after I got to work I lost a patient. That's always the toughest part of the job (for me). It always feels good to return to work, it keeps me busy --too busy to think of all the non sense in life.

I've been home for a few hours now, but my 4 dogs (Madison, Gibby, Jack, & Prissy) have kept me busy as always. I've been walking and feeding everyone for at least two hours. Feels good to almost be done for the day:) Now I'm watching Grey's Anatomy season 2. I bought the series this weekend at Target after leaving Dr. McCall's house. The show is my "therapy", it's pretty hard to think of anything else when it's on.

Pondering

I posted this picture with tonight's post because it reminds of a time when I seemed to be in a better place. I've spent all day at home, not really wanting to be around anyone. I'm feeling burnt out on life. It's a hard feeling to describe, because I don't particularly feel depressed, but still right under the surface I feel a deep sadness. As pathetic as it sounds, I only feel happy when it's just me & my dogs or when I'm at work --working with animals all day long. I thank God for blessing me to have a job that I truly love with all my heart. No matter how ungrateful I may seem, I know I could be somewhere else working a job that I hate. I don't really have many friends and that's actually a good thing, cutting some people out of my life has been a great thing. But sometimes (like recently) I feel like the few people that I call friends are unhealthy (for me). My heart sinks every time I think of Augusta, I'll always consider her a friend, but it hurts to think that her life is in jeopardy. Bradley is a great friend, but I'm feeling pretty distant from him, I can't quiet seem to move past the "past" and I'm about ready to just move on and be happy with just hanging out with me & my dogs. They've never turned their back on me, so I feel like our friendship is a for sure thing. I just thank God tomorrow is Monday and I go back to work :)