Back to business

When things get tough, plant yourself; stead-fast and focused.  You can't overcome your problems in life when your focus is off track.  I can't go into detail at the moment, but those of you reading know the struggle I've been going through.  I thank EACH AND EVERYONE of you who showed me support.  Thank you for your prayers, listening to me vent, sending uplifting messages and remaining stead-fast with me.  All those nights I stayed up unable to sleep because the stress weighed on me, I am thankful for all of you.  It hasn't been easy.  Never did I doubt my faith, because no matter how intense things may have gotten, I chose to believe!  Many times my faith ran dry and I had to rely on the kind words of friends to carry through to another day.  I've said it before and I'll say it again, when we overcome one obstacle in life, there's a brief reprieve then another test presents itself.  I thank You Lord that this long, tiring, (emotionally & physically) draining storm is over!

I want to share a word of encouragement with all of you who are reading this.  As my Aunt Toni would say "I'm not tell you what I heard.  I'm telling you what I know!"  And what I know is people will try everything within human possibility to destroy you by breaking your spirit.  Don't allow anyone (husband, wife, supervisor, mom, dad, etc.) ever crush your spirit.  When words of encouragement can't be heard from a single being, plant your feet solid on the ground in which you stand, look up and start speaking words of encouragement to yourself.  Even if you don't believe a single thing coming out your mouth, keep speaking words of faith and encouragement.  I can't tell you how much strength you'll find when you continue to say positive things about yourself.  I've been there!  At one point I remember mentally being so exhausted I had to lock myself away in my room.  I turned every light off and wept from heart.  I spoke words of encouragement to myself.  I spoke those words aloud because (for me) there's something about saying it out loud.  I am a good person, no matter what people say or think about me.  I won't let anyone steal my faith, because good will overcome evil.  My life is meant for me to enjoy it, in abundance to the full until it overflows and no demon in hell can take that right from me.  I know someday this storm is going to be over!  I can make it...


Again, thank you to any of you who supported me through one of the most difficult times I've had to go through!  I want to get back to me.  I have a job to do and a life to live...so back to business :)

Blessed

Within the inner sanctum of my soul I hear a quiet voice saying "pray, pray, pray".  There's nothing more to do but pray...and wait.  Fighting away the anxiety that comes with waiting feels like a relentless battle when all you want is for things to change.  It feels like that change can't come soon enough.  Either way I'm here to say that I've planted my feet and I'm going to wait.  Wait on the Lord.  Joy will be restored in the lives of my lost friends, as long as there's breath in my body I'm going to believe that things will change.  It's been ordained, joy is on the way.  I've never believed more than I do now, but His word shall not return void, and though weeping my endure for a night joy will come in the morning (Psalm 30:5).  Only the Lord knows how precious that passage is to me.  I've seen it through so many dark times in my life.  Never once have I been let down by it.

I've had nights where I've all but drown in my own tears, crying out "Lord help me, I can't go on", thinking I was going to succumb to the pain, the hurt, the betrayal, & anger.  But every time I've been brought back to that scripture.  I know now that weeping is only temporary when I am willing to hand it over.  All of you that read this I want to encourage you to hold on because joy is on the way.  I want to close this with the song that I'm listening to right now.  The words have inspired me so much to just hold on....just wait!  I am believing the best will happen in the lives of those I love, no matter what they're going through.  We're all human and dark times try to bring us all to our demise.  I am so thankful that I didn't end it when I felt the pressure increase because now I know that my bigger purpose yet to be served in this life...

I may never climb a mountain so I can see the world from there
I may never ride the waves and taste the salty ocean air
Or build a bridge that will last a hundred years
But no matter where the road leads 
One thing is always clear


I am blessed from when I rise up in the morning
Until I lay my head to rest
I feel you near me
You soothe me when I'm weary
Lord for all the worst and all the best
I am blessed 


These are the lyrics that changed my life forever, because in that moment I remember saying to God that I'm done.  This life is not worth it anymore and this song started playing.  And at that moment it hit me!  I'm blessed, He's not done with me, and joy was sure to come in the morning!

hanging on

Better days are ahead, certainly.  I know the Lord will not continue to let these issues increase.  Have you ever dealt with something so long that you begin to physically see yourself change before your own eyes???  I know that I'm where I should be, this is my destiny.  Despite what may be going on around me, I genuinely love my job and nothing can change that.  People will be people and I have to bear with things until His will be done.  In the midst of all my struggles and doubts, I have a strong feeling emerging from my heart softly whispering to me "the fight is almost over, hang on".  I am not at liberty to speak about anything work related, but friends I ask you say a prayer for me.  I need strength to continue on.  I'm a fighter, and it takes a lot to take me out.  I have no doubt things will work out in my favor, but still strength is needed right now in order me to continue functioning.

The Golden Girls

Nothing compares to having a day off and relaxing all day while watching The Golden Girls!  Funny stuff!

The Challenge: If You Really Knew Me

I watched a MTV reality show tonight, "If You Really Knew".  I'm still in awe at the veracity of this show.  It really awakened many things in me, perhaps things that I have neglected to deal with for whatever reasons.  The show is based in a new high school each week.  The goal of the show is for different groups to open up and expose certain facets of their lives, that people probably haven't taken into account.  Numerous times during the show I found myself in tears, physical tears that I couldn't control.  At one point I even found myself thinking what is wrong with you.  Hearing the different confessions really hit home.  I used to be many of these people!

I thought to myself I know what you're going through and it will get better, only because I've been there before.  I can remember what it was like in high school too, and even as an adult I've had to battle a lot of these issues.  I know that feeling on loneliness, as though the world is drifting away before your eyes and no one bothers to help save you.  There were confessions of ongoing turmoil at home that affects the daily interactions these kids have outside of home.  Those were the particular confessions that made me regress back to the days that I thought I'd never survive.

Fortunate and blessed are words I use to describe my existence today, because more days than not, I didn't know if I'd make it to the next day.  I wanted things to end because life wasn't worth living on.  No one loved me anyways.  Things were so awful at home that my ability to cope was withered and didn't seem to be pointing in a good place. Within my spirit the will to live was completely gone.  It's like all my hope reached a point of irrelevance.  Nothing will ever change, I thought.  Those who I felt were obligated by God to love me didn't do that.  Family???  Psssh, yeah that was a joke.  They didn't care or at least they didn't show it, that's for sure.  I grew up alone and isolated.  The man who I thought was my father neglected me in every sense of the word.  My mom cared for everything but me, it seemed.  Having to go to school and deal with secondary issues only applied more pressure.  Not being able to talk to friends because of the embarrassment of my private life only wore me down faster.  Sometimes just simple act of smiling at people felt like a job.  I learned to bottle it all up.  On several occasions I felt I'd come to the end.  I did everything I knew to do yet nothing seemed to yield positive results.  Of course I could go on, and expose more specific details, but it's not about that tonight.  Just know that I made it.  It's possible for anyone out there to make, despite the naysayers.

In retrospect I see that everything has its place and time.  The Lord blessed me with the right people to carry me from one level to the next.  These individuals validated me and appreciated the love I had buried beneath the rubble of anger and pain.  The main person being my precious Aunt Toni.  My eyes are watery just thinking of how she saw something me.  Her support guided me through, no matter who was in my life she remained that constant.  There were others who saw my heart and embraced me and I appreciated each one of them.  I'm so thankful for those who inspired me to live on through the darkness and pain.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.  Though we're all spread out across the country now, I'll never forget a single person who helped keep me afloat.  I dare not think of where things could have gone had God's infinite timing not prevailed.

Like the show, I challenge all of you (including myself) to go back to square one.  Love.  It's just that simple.  The rest falls into the proper place once we take it back to basics.  Stop caring about religion, race, sexuality, and the slew of other issues we put so much emphasis on.  Until we start grasp the concept and power of love, nothing else matters.

Looking forward to tomorrow

Plotting my demise only inspires me to fight harder.  I believe that good will overcome evil.  It's that simple.  One way or another.  This week has been a stressful one, but you know what I'm here for the long haul.  I don't know if next week will be better but I'm willing to take it on and give it my best shot.  Nothing, and I do mean nothing will stop me from looking forward to tomorrow.  Storms only last so long.  Good night....

-A

Good morning

Good morning.  I'm about to leave my apartment and make my way to work.  I'm leaving this weekend behind, because I know a higher power is looking out for me and justice is always served.  I plan to bring positive energy everywhere I go today, despite what is taking place around me.  Life is what you make it.  I'm still not happy with the way some things have transpired, but I know in due time it'll be addressed.  I hope everyone has a great day :)

Shame, shame, shame

Hi I'm back.  My life has been consumed by work as most of you probably would have suspected.  Unfortunately I am returning with some disturbing revelations.  I can't be very specific at this time, but I'm honestly filled with rage.  Trying to maintain and conduct myself as an adult while knowing people whom I am supposed to be on a team with are doing some less the acceptable things, is very difficult.  All I can really say at the moment is shame on you.  Without ethics you won't survive to become a truly successful person.  I work hard and I love what  I do, I will never forfeit being a decent person for the sake of recognition, money, or any other selfish desire.  Doing wrong by others and getting away with it will eventually catch up with you.  Shame on you.

Update: work pt. 3

I worked with our extended family at the Montgomery hospital last week.  It was a nice change of pace & atmosphere from my home hospital.  I'm looking forward to going back.  They're a great group of young charismatic individuals.  I am giving it my all to help spread positive energy within the workplace.  I can be charismatic too!  Working with the combination of animals and high quality medicine comes with its own stress and tension.  I'm not changing over night, but everyday I am giving it a little more effort to become a different person.  Since our hospital has changed to an associate hospital, our staff has been more than double.  I don't want to run away any of the new people with my "attitude".  Trust me, I know I'd be tempted to leave a job if I had to work with me some days!  Haha - and it's not that I'm mean or bossy, but I like things a certain way (yeah that doesn't sound bossy Antonio haha); every pet I see isn't just a dog or cat they're like my own.  I want them to be treated with respect.  My focus is make sure the pets are as comfortable as possible while under my care.  I think I am one of the easiest people to work with on our team, but when it comes to new people I am very cautious and slightly overbearing only because I want them to understand the importance of giving every pet respect and not stressing them out.  A stressed out animal is more difficult to treat and usually becomes known as one of those that none of us want to see.  I'm imperfect but I'm going to work on my personality flaws before I scare away the newbies lol :)

Big ego

Be careful of the energy you put out there, what you put out you will inherit double the portion.  That is a fact, like it or not.  It's easy to exalt ourselves, but when you work with a team you take "me" and "I" out of the picture, to be replaced by "us" and "we".  That is a team.  No longer will exalting oneself be acceptable, because "I" no longer exist.   Each person within that group plays in intricate part in seeing that the job gets completed, efficiently.  Fragile egos always stand out as red flags (to me), because when you're working to attain a goal that will improve the lives of others there's no room for shallow egos.  Instead, focus on what YOU can do to help not only improve those around you, but also on what will improve you as well.  None of us should ever reach a point to where we feel we're done growing.  As long as there's breath within my body, I know there's still room for me to grow.  A team will never advance and succeed when there's war within the fort.  A relationship can't see it's brightest days until we leave our egos at the door.

Step one

OK I'm sitting here having a "moment", that's what I call these intimate times when I'm alone with my thoughts.  I found myself having one of these moments about two days ago.  When I have a moment I know it's happening for a reason...and if I'm still and quiet, I can probably hear what is being said.  Tonight all I've heard is love, love, love....


I can't lose sight of the goal.  Starting tonight I am opening my heart again to be fully examined, because I feel myself allowing the negativity of some situations to overtake my spirit.  I've been consumed with work issues 24/7 for the last few weeks.  At the end of the day I want my heart to be open to forgiving those whom I feel have wronged me and start back at step one, with love.  If there's one thing that's for sure it's that each day you'll be presented with a chance to go back to basics of life and humanity: LOVE.  So many days I don't want to think of giving love to anyone, in fact more often than not I'd rather give someone a good ol' "love" tap right up side their head.  I think the latter is a side effect from working with people because I've been feeling that way more and more each day.  I know this "moment" keeps tugging at my heart for a reason.  No matter how complicated life gets there's always that basic action that starts the movement in the right direction...LOVE

Update: work pt.2

The picture above is from the chaotic mess of Saturday. 

Okay last weeks lesson: GAIN CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE and FIND BALANCE...AGAIN!!!

First of all, I'm just thankful to God that I made it through the week.  It's been awhile since I've felt so overwhelmed to the point of possibly cracking under the pressure.  Each day got worse than the day before.  Being busy is always a good thing, but without enough solid support around you it's hard.  I'm not faulting anyone, because there was nothing any of us could do to make the load any easier.  By the time I left work Saturday night (over 2 hours late, by the way) I was drowning in exhaustion.  Relentless headache, frustrated, & of course....exhausted.

To update those of you who don't know what's been going on my hospital is being converted to an Associate Hospital.  With this conversion I've been working with a smaller staff.  Not that we ever had enough staff before, so now it's understood what a blow this is to have an even smaller staff.  Somehow I've lost myself within this transition.  After reflecting on this week I saw that I allowed the insanity around me to cause me to lose balance in my life.  Bringing work home with me is something I have got to stop NOW.  If 12 hours isn't enough time to serve in one day then I guess people will just have to deal with it.  I've played with 'burn-out' before and it's not worth it.  Burn-out causes me to easily become angry with co-workers, short tempered, & prevents me from giving my all to the job that I love.

I'll survive this transition.  I have to embrace balance in order to go back to that place of serenity.  Since I've been there before, let me be the first to tell you it's a beautiful thing.  After the sun sets on this chapter of my life serenity shall return again.  This much I know is true.

love

Life tough times are rough, but remember we all have the power of love.  When friends and family fall weak, use the love to help hold them up.  Speak gently, open your heart, and let love take over.  Through love and the acceptance of love, restoration is born.


Felt like keeping it short for this post, because love is such a strong word.  When you stop and take it the power of those four letters you'll realize why it's best to keep this one simple.


L.O.V.E.

TGIF

THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY! (and the crowd cheers)  This week has been in a league of it's on.  Let's just say I'm happy to have it behind me.  I'm just so thoroughly disgusted with the way some "professionals" choose to conduct themselves.  Lack of respect for the profession in which you work.  I think those of us who make the choice to work with animals should stop and do a heart check.  Is my heart really in this?  How far am I willing to go to improve and enrich the lives I have in my hands everyday?  Let's not take advantage of the fact that the owner trusts anything we choose to do, and their child "can't talk".  I know to a certain extent I live in a Disney world, where everyone wants what's best for the animals.  This week has been filled with picking up the slack of others just because the utter lack of care or concern, and that bothers me.  To be frank, it pisses me off and makes me mad as hell.  I'm not angered by picking up the slack, I'm disgusted that a person who is supposed to 'help' an innocent pet would ever allow themselves to get in the position of not caring.  I completely understand that we all have our days where we're not as good as we were the day before.  But damn, this is a field that by dropping the ball once would make you responsible for harming a life; the opposite of what our true intent should be.  Again, thank God it's Friday!

I wish I could help

I'm sitting here.  Anticipating tomorrow.  Not in a good way because my mind is going in a thousand different directions.  I'm speechless.  My heart is aching for my Aunt.  I hate the feeling of being helpless because I like knowing that there's something I can do.  In this case I know there's nothing that any of us can do.  On Saturday, March 27th, her precious companion, her baby, Muffin went home to be with the Lord after 15 years.  For those of you out there who truly value your pets, you understand the deep dark pain that comes when you lose one of yours.  In our eyes they're not pets, they're family and when they leave us it hurts just as much.  Muffin has apart of our family since I was 10 years old.  Tonight I lift my Aunt Toni up in prayer for strength because I know it hurts.  I can't understand or explain why things like this happen.  I just trust that God will hold her up.


I know that lately things have been so hard
And looking out through your broken heart
All you can see is dark and lonely days ahead
But remember Jesus said...
He knows every star in the sky
Every single tear that you cry
His love is here, faithful and alive
I know that this world can be cold
In His arms you're never alone
That's His promise to you and I

We Belong Together/Fly Like A Bird

Just wanted to share one of my favorite MC performances. Enjoy!

We made it

Another long day has been successfully completed.  I'm not sure if was the full moon or what, but today brought us loads of emergencies.  Perhaps I jinxed myself by thinking it was going to be a "light" day based on your surgery/exam schedule.  All I'm going to say it we made it and thank you Lord for such a strong team of people. We worked like a well oiled machine.  Now with the day behind me I am going to relax.  Watch TV and drink a fat glass of wine.  Until next time...

Update: work pt.1

It's been a busy week.  I apologize for my absence.  As most of you know by now there's been a lot of changes going at job.  I'm nervous and excited about the future.  Thanks to everyone of you who keep my name in your prayers.  I need them now more than anything.  I've spent the last few months in prayer and thought about this love I have; my job.  I knew some changes would be taking place this year, and the thought of a certain person becoming my "boss" just wasn't going to happen.  However, every time I had a negative thought of a particular person that I honestly wanted to get rid of I heard this little voice in back of my mind saying don't you make a move, I've got this.  One thing I've always believed in is karma.  What you put out there will come back to you with double the power.  I'm too afraid of trying to dig a grave for someone else, because that's when you end up hurting yourself.  So with that said I've remained firm...just standing, waiting, believing that God's taking care of me.  There's nothing like giving up what little control you think you have.  Well here I am...believing, just believing that the best will work out in the end.

Leisure day

The sun is shining, there's a nice cool breeze light blowing, and I'm off today!  Could today get any better?  The most productive activity I've been able to do today is take my dogs out for a nice long walk.  It would have been cruel for me to not let them enjoy this beautiful day.  Now I'm going to continue my own personal Sex And The City marathon.

No choice but to swim

In life I find those who take a stand and who go against the flow in order to remain true to themselves to be the most inspirational influences.  How simple it is to be typical and 'follow the leader'.  No, no no.  It's about being an individual.  The road for those of us who believe in the phrase "I'm free to be me", don't travel so easy.  On this road we encounter loneliness & rejection - almost to the point where you stop and think somethings wrong with me.  I have learned to stop thinking that way.  I think it's a natural thought pattern after years of being an individual.

To those out there taking a stand in honor of your liberty, continue to fight the fight that wages war against your life.  Stand tall, stand strong...this road is only so long.  When no one calls to give you those words of encouragement to go on, remember that we all have inner strength inside us.  I remember nights when I prayed and truly believed that someone would be sent my way to give my encouragement.  Almost every time, I was left feeling lonelier that before - loosing more and more faith in mankind and my 'friends'.  Through those terrible experiences I learned that inner strength is found when you're alone and have no one to rely but yourself.  It's either sink or swim.  True fighters look at it from one point of view: SWIM!  No choice but to swim.

I say never give up, never give in...seasons change.  And know that your day is coming.

No time like the present

I know, I know I've been away too long.  I admit I've been a little self absorbed as of late haha.  Between work and being sick I haven't had time to update.  Hope everyone is doing great.  Tomorrow's Friday - another week behind me (amen).  Tomorrow I want to give it all I've got and do an even better job while helping to improve the lives of animals.  For the last couple of weeks I've honestly been giving it 90% of what I've got because of my utter disgust with certain people in the work place.  Years ago I told myself I would never let the politics change how I feel about my job, because it's something I genuinely love.  It's always easier to say it than do it.  The laziness of some people is just appalling, to the point where I want to just meet them at their game.  I can be lazy too, if you want me to play this game with you.  However,  I've had to step back to remind myself that some of us do this job because we love animals.  I won't be pulled into mediocrity because of someone else's short comings and lack of ambition.  I'm not waiting for next week to come before I choose to start over.  Today is the day...now is the time.

When it's gone, it's gone.

Why is it that in the moments of tragedy, heartache, & pain I seem to see my life from a different point of view?  I value my existence a little more.  I don't get it.   Everyday I wake up should be reason enough for me to smile.  Some days I wake up and I immediately think "here we go again, new day, same $#!%"...sad but it's true.  I have really put a focus on being a better, more positive person this year.  The last week at work has been far from the best, but hey I'm still here.  I have must some fight left in me huh?  I thought I realized how this whole life thing works, unlike I saw how I've started to let small unimportant things taint my life.  Through anothers tragedy I've taken notice to my short comings and it shames me.  Life is precious, plain and simple it's a gift.  It's raining out right now, which doesn't really help the mood.  As I sit here I'm thinking of tomorrow...

An old friend and former classmate of mine will be laid to rest tomorrow morning.  A genuinely good person that I never really thought would leave this life so soon.  There's a freedom in death, no more worries, sorrows, or pain but then there's the other part of death, imprisonment.  Those left to live on and agonize over things we wish we'd said and done, but now it's too late.  Time is of the essence.  When it's gone, it's gone.

My review: The Mariah show

Hello everyone!  I'm still feeling really good from last night!  It's the MC high!  I went to the Mariah Carey concert in Atlanta at the Fox Theatre.  Wait, did I just call her by first and last name?  I never do that!  We've been hanging together since 1990...she's known (to me) as 'M', 'MC', or just Mariah...back to the point, sorry for going into that spiral.  The show was incredible!  Mariah performed 17 songs, all of which were LIVE!  What else would you expect from her?  Her personality was entertaining (to us fans) as always.  During the 2 hour set, she poked fun at herself for being hailed a 'diva', calling make-up & hair assistances on stage for a "touch up", requesting a wine glass with "apple juice" (after taking a sip she says "this ain't apple juice I don't care what you say"), requesting a mic stand, having a throng of male dancers carry her on and off the stage.  These are things we love her for!  When you're Mariah Carey (there I go again) you can do that and it's part of the 'norm'.

The showed had a good mix of new & old material.  Of course I was on my feet the entire time, singing every song along with her.  Her dedication of "Angels Cry" to the victims of the Haiti tragedy was particularly moving.  Lots of emotion--I can't even explain the chill bumps that took over my body.  Speaking of emotion, my favorite song of the night was when she took us back to 1991...yes she performed "Emotions".  You know the song with about 200 high notes and runs.  MC proved that she still "has it", she hit every note and created some new ones in the song like she was 21 years old again.  "We Belong Together" was the crowd mover for sure.  I saw an old couple (looks like they were in their mid 60s) swaying and holding each other while singing every line of the song.  Oh did I mention "We Belong Together" was named SONG OF THE DECADE by Billboard magazine?  It was Mariah's 16th #1...we call it her 'sweet 16'.  After the show I waited outside the backstage area to meet MC...and well let me tell ya, she was the complete opposite of Mary J. Blige (lest we forget the Best Buy experience last month? I think not).  Mariah came out and took pictures with the fans, signed memorabilia, & talked with us.  She actually made the fans feel like we're worth more than the money we pour into her pockets.  Ahh, I'm forever a fan!  Also her staff was much nicer than that of a certain other diva.  I was extremely happy to be able to meet some very special people (to me) like her long time friend and back up vocalist Trey Lorenz.  For those of you who don't know who that is, he's the gentleman singing with her on her 6th #1 single I'll Be There.  It was Trey's birthday, so we sang for him as he came out to meet & greet with everyone.  The other back up vocalist (I love Sherry!) was very kind, stopping to take pics and chat with everyone, the dancers, and body guards were all in good spirits.  All in all it was worth more than what I paid!  Mariah did the damn thing!

Haiti

Sitting here preparing for bed, what a long but successful work day.  Only a few days left until the Mariah concert!  I'm thinking of how blessed I am. To see me some days you wouldn't know that I'm thankful for all I have.  I want to continue striving for a stronger sense of humility.  In this tough economy I have a job, food, shelter and then some.  Why do senseless tragedies have to happen in order to provoke me to step back, look at my life and realize just how good I have it?  The citizens and victims of Haiti are in my prayers everyday.  Thank You Lord for putting me in a position to be able to give.  They too are our brothers and sisters...let us not forget that.

Angels Advocate Tour

Only 6 days left!!!!! :)

Happy New Year! Less is more

Belated happy new year everyone!  I'm so thankful to be here to see 2010, what a blessing!  I don't really get into New Years resolutions, mainly because I forget most of them within a week or just give up and say 'the hell with it' out of frustration haha.  Why add unnecessary stress to my life for the first week of a new year?  The only thing I've committed myself to is enjoying life even more and being an all around better person.  I'm kinda cheating, because those are two elements of life I'm always working to improve on.  I have hope that I'll be successful with both feats again this year.  Looking back at my life over the last 5 years I would say I've changed (for the better) and continuously finding myself being molded into a better person who enjoys life for what it's worth.  Speaking from personal experience it helped me to give the ax to a lot of people in 2009.  The year was practically smooth sailing in comparison to previous years.  Less "friends"=less drama=less depression=less self loathing.  I never dreamed I'd prefer having a simplistic life with only 2 or 3 friends, as opposed to always being surrounded by people, doing socially appealing things.  It's overrated.  That's a testament to my growth beyond childish needs for love & acceptance by people.  In more ways than one I feel like that same child, burnt many times, but refusing to remain bitter.  I just want to remain as positive as possible and take my life one day at a time...enjoying myself, my friends, & the journey that has led me to this place.

Happy New Year
-A

P.S.
I'm going to start my year off by enjoying Mariah LIVE in Atlanta on January 19th!  I can't wait to see her since my favorite songs live on her "Angel's Advocate" tour :)